Just.... KIDDING.

I had the most hits on my blog yesterday that I've ever had. I suspect it's because you all saw my April Fool's post and had to keep coming back to see if I was JUST KIDDING!

Yes, yes, I was JUST KIDDING.

Brian will probably be kidnapped by aliens before he gets baby fever. In fact, the other day, when the conversation was hijacked by me turned to getting pregnant, and I began to ask if maybe it was time, Brian held out his arms on either side of him and said, "If you're about to ask me about babies or getting pregnant or ditching the plan, I'm going to cover my ears and scream!"

"Oh, no, honey," I recovered. "I was just going to tell you that - um - I love you?"

"Good enough. Let's go for a walk."

It's frustrating to not get what you want, especially if you are a woman and you have a sneaking suspicion that you know everything and isn't that why your husband married you? So that he could determine the secrets of the universe? And discover God's REAL plan for his life?

And it's also frustrating when your hopes don't line up with the hopes of someone you love so much, and you rediscover on a daily basis that your minds are in very, very different places. While you're thinking, I am on day 32 of my cycle and is that a pregnancy symptom I am feeling? he is thinking, I wanted to order that tree stand and darn it, now they've discontinued it and I am going to have to find something else! And when each of you open your mouths to voice your frustrations there is a moment of brief confusion and misunderstanding when you both realize, that's what's on your mind? Ohhhh. That's... dumb.

Anyway, these years are apparently for something else - maybe for learning that one life change doesn't guarantee joy, that joy is to be found no matter where you are in life as long as you can lean on your Heavenly Father. I believe that, through and through and forever, and I'm learning to trust in it as well.

Until then, I'm going to enjoy this man that I've got. He IS pretty cute, if I do say so myself, and he makes me laugh. In fact, after I publish this, maybe I will go ask him something annoying, just to watch him cover his ears and scream. After all, isn't that a temper tantrum? And if I want a baby, I might as well get some experience.

Sheesh!

I can't understand what's come over Brian.

Just this morning, as he sat drinking his coffee, I caught him poring over the Pottery Barn Kids nurseries online. "Look at this one," he said without a trace of sheepishness when he noticed me staring. "Isn't this a GREAT idea for a gender-neutral nursery?" he asked.

I nodded, perplexed. "Yeah, I like it," I agreed.

His face lit up. "Awesome!" he said, nodding enthusiastically. "I LOVE the whole 'cottontail rabbit' theme. I mean, this stuff is stinkin' cute."

"Uh-huh," I managed.

"I know Pottery Barn stuff is expensive," he said, "but this is definitely what I want, down to this exact crib." He poked the computer screen and took a sip of his coffee."It's a transitional crib. You can make it a full-size bed once we're done having babies. And wouldn't it be so cute if we had some bunny decals on the nursery walls?"

I peered closer and noticed that he had several tabs open on his screen. "Honey, are you on BabyCenter?" I asked incredulously.

He smiled bashfully. "I can't get enough of these pregnancy forums. They have a group for every due date." He shrugged. "I know we're not TTC yet, but I just love when someone posts a picture of their BFP. It's exciting to think about what Birth Club we'd join if we got pregnant this month." He peered at me and raised his eyebrows. "Did you know that a pregnancy that starts in March would be a December baby?" His eyes lit up. "Imagine that, honey. A Christmas baby." He sighed.

"Riiiiight."

"And I know you're going to yell at me for this," he said, clicking to another page, "but I started putting together a list of things that I thought would be good to have once we do have a baby."

My jaw dropped. "Brian Christopher, that is a registry!"

He shrugged. "So?"

"You can't register at Babies 'R' Us when you're not even pregnant! What the heck's wrong with you?!"

"Calm down," he scoffed. "It's no different than making a Christmas wish list." He looked at me sideways, smiling. "Honey...... a Christmas baby...."

"No way," I said. "This is nonsense. And it's getting late. You better get your shower and leave."

"Fine, Miss Baby-Hater. Anyway, I'm going to bookmark this nursery." He saved the page, naming the bookmark "Daddy's Favorite". He gulped the last of his coffee, closed the browser, and stood up to finish getting ready for work. "I tell ya," he said, shaking his head, "usually, around this time of year, I start thinking about getting ready for hunting season. But for some reason, I've just got baby fever." He shot me a giant, pleading grin. "Maeg, I know we're only celebrating our fourth anniversary this summer, but..."

"No," I said flatly. "Any more talk of babies and I'll move the date to seven years." I smacked him good-naturedly on the butt. "Now go get ready for work."

Please, heaven help me! What am I going to do with this guy?


Okay, okay, okay - April Fool's. You didn't believe me anyway!