Thursday, April 1, 2010

Sheesh!

I can't understand what's come over Brian.

Just this morning, as he sat drinking his coffee, I caught him poring over the Pottery Barn Kids nurseries online. "Look at this one," he said without a trace of sheepishness when he noticed me staring. "Isn't this a GREAT idea for a gender-neutral nursery?" he asked.

I nodded, perplexed. "Yeah, I like it," I agreed.

His face lit up. "Awesome!" he said, nodding enthusiastically. "I LOVE the whole 'cottontail rabbit' theme. I mean, this stuff is stinkin' cute."

"Uh-huh,"
I managed.

"I know Pottery Barn stuff is expensive," he said, "but this is definitely what I want, down to this exact crib." He poked the computer screen and took a sip of his coffee."It's a transitional crib. You can make it a full-size bed once we're done having babies. And wouldn't it be so cute if we had some bunny decals on the nursery walls?"

I peered closer and noticed that he had several tabs open on his screen. "Honey, are you on BabyCenter?" I asked incredulously.

He smiled bashfully. "I can't get enough of these pregnancy forums. They have a group for every due date." He shrugged. "I know we're not TTC yet, but I just love when someone posts a picture of their BFP. It's exciting to think about what Birth Club we'd join if we got pregnant this month." He peered at me and raised his eyebrows. "Did you know that a pregnancy that starts in March would be a December baby?" His eyes lit up. "Imagine that, honey. A Christmas baby." He sighed.

"Riiiiight."

"And I know you're going to yell at me for this," he said, clicking to another page, "but I started putting together a list of things that I thought would be good to have once we do have a baby."

My jaw dropped. "Brian Christopher, that is a registry!"

He shrugged. "So?"

"You can't register at Babies 'R' Us when you're not even pregnant! What the heck's wrong with you?!"

"Calm down," he scoffed. "It's no different than making a Christmas wish list." He looked at me sideways, smiling. "Honey...... a Christmas baby...."

"No way," I said. "This is nonsense. And it's getting late. You better get your shower and leave."

"Fine, Miss Baby-Hater. Anyway, I'm going to bookmark this nursery." He saved the page, naming the bookmark "Daddy's Favorite". He gulped the last of his coffee, closed the browser, and stood up to finish getting ready for work. "I tell ya," he said, shaking his head, "usually, around this time of year, I start thinking about getting ready for hunting season. But for some reason, I've just got baby fever." He shot me a giant, pleading grin. "Maeg, I know we're only celebrating our fourth anniversary this summer, but..."

"No," I said flatly. "Any more talk of babies and I'll move the date to seven years." I smacked him good-naturedly on the butt. "Now go get ready for work."

Please, heaven help me! What am I going to do with this guy?


Okay, okay, okay - April Fool's. You didn't believe me anyway!

2 comments:

  1. April Fools! I would have believed you if you stopped after 1 paragraph! And my husband is super involved, but would never ever go to Pottery Barn Kids! LOL

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  2. I can't believe people fell for this. No one who really knows Brian would think this conversation would EVER happen, even if he was ready to have a baby.

    Great April Fool's blog, though. You have a very warped imagination. :)

    And I still think you should write a book.

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