But just look at the baaaaaby.....

I have rarely felt more pathetic in my life than on several occasions since becoming a pet owner.

Never before in my life would I have trudged through rain and layers of mud to walk a dog.

Never would I have thought I'd be one of those unbearable pet owners who schedule play dates and organize their schedules around the dog's napping habits.

Never would I think to miss Sunday school because I didn't want to coop the animal up in his crate for more than three hours.

Never, before Beau, would I have willingly and happily sorted through one hundred and twenty pounds of noodley chicken necks, wrinkling my nose at the smell of chicken juice-soaked cardboard and painstakingly disinfecting the tailgate of the truck after the trialsome process.

And never - never - would I have thought I'd stoop intently to monitor the consistency of his stools, then call my mother and my neighbor in glee, screeching, "GOOD POOP TODAY!"