Dear Baby,
You are kicking my butt. Seriously, kicking it hard.
Last night Will said, "Mommy, I'm sorry you're sad." I wasn't acting particularly sad right then, but I certainly have had my moments. I was so touched. For all the empathy Will lacks toward Barrett, he gives to me. I said, "I'm not sad, honey. I'm just growing a baby. And so all my fun and my energy and my ... activities... are all going to the baby so it can grow strong and healthy."
"Ohh," he whispered. "I have a baby in my tummy too."
"You do?" I asked, smiling. "I don't think you have a baby in your tummy, Will."
"No, I do," he insisted.
Will likes to peer into my belly button and try to see you, baby. If only we could do that! Wouldn't it be amazing?
I'm counting down the days until I can see your healthy little heartbeat on May 11. It's not hard to have faith that all's well in there, considering how miserable I feel. I love you and I know it's not your fault. It's just a part of life. But you are going to be SO worth it.
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