Friday, March 5, 2010

Another lighthearted debate about something that does not apply to either of us in any way.

On a one-hour special of The Office last night, Jim and Pam finally have their baby. But their hospital experience is not quite what they imagined – cramped, crowded, confusing. At one point, when Pam is having trouble nursing, a lactation consultant comes into the room to offer his services. Yes, he happens to be a man. So some awkwardness ensues.

And this is a conversation that took place here, between the Bri and the Maeg:

-Commercial Break Begins-

Maegan: “THAT is why we are NOT having our baby at a hospital. Sleeping in a tiny bed, sharing your room with people you don’t know, meeting nurses and doctors and lactation specialists you’ve never seen before in your entire life… I want a midwife that can do those things. One person. Having a baby is special! I don’t want it to be like THAT!”

Brian, scoffing: “A lactation specialist?! PLEASE. It’s called COMMON SENSE.”

Maegan, leaning forward in her seat: “Honey, lots of women need advice when they start nursing. Like probably one in two women. It’s not easy!”

Brian, scoffing: “WhatEVER. Call your MOM if you can’t nurse.”

Maegan, defensive: “She’d be seven hundred miles away! And what if someone’s mom doesn’t know how to help?”

Brian, scoffing: “Women have figured it out for thousands of years. Again, common sense!”

Maegan, sputtering: “Well - well - the reason they figured it out is 'cause they have experienced midwives!” (Eyeball blood vessel explodes.)

Brian, scoffing: “Feeding your baby is natural. It’s called common sense. ‘Da-da-doy. I can’t feed my baby. I need a lactation specialist.’” (Taunting, schoolyard laugh.)

-Commercial Break Ends-

Maegan, leaning back in her seat, muttering psych-patient style: “You don’t know what you’re talking about. You have no idea what you’re talking about. You have no idea.”

Brian, scoffing: “COMMON. SENSE.”

Please, all my experienced mom-readers, weigh in! No scoffing allowed in this forum!


  1. From Brian's perspective, I can see how it would seem one just needs common sense to nurse the baby she just gave birth to. Surely, mankind has survived for thousands of years without "Lactation Specialists."

    The other side--and there is usually one or two more sides :) --is that women have been giving birth for thousands of years, and though this is a very natural part of life, women need birthing "specialists." Women often do need help with nursing, as questions and problems--even serious ones--do arise. I sure needed help with you, Maegan! I had no mom to call as her generation used bottles.

    You and Brian are both smart people...watching a stupid show!

    Regarding a male lactation specialist as portrayed on "The Office," well, when was the last time a co-worker took a hatchet to your kitchen cupboards? "The Office" should stick to life in the office!

  2. I won't say much b/c I might jump through my computer and put my hands around Brians neck! LOL. Well, not really...but I can't WAIT until you guys have kids and see how complicated it really is. I nursed, kind of got it, but wasn't sure Peyton was getting enough. Thank god a lactation specialist taught me how to listen to his sucking and swallowing!! Oh the stuff Brian will wait! :)